Monday's video of the City Council meeting was very sad and touching. It was really saddening about the number of teens who'd committed suicide after their sexual orientation was publicized. We may not all agree on the choices that people make for their own lives, but no one has a right to humiliate and harrass a person to the point that suicide is the only way out. Come on now, we've all been through some form of teasing during childhood, but the line must be drawn somewhere. And, the adults who are supposed to guide and protect the youth of today need to be present more often so that less of this teasing and torture can be done. Many times, the teasing and joking comes from ignorance, and not understanding the full concept. Generalized statement: We shy away from what we don't understand, and laughing about it puts more emphasis on the misunderstood person, situation, or thing than on ourselves. Hmmm ..........
Our discussions this week remind me of personal experiences with family, friends, and co-workers who identify with the LGBTQ community. My first real experience (outside of the media) was in high school. I think it was after A.I.S.D. went back to bussing the Eastside and Westside students. There were two white lesbians in our school (that we knew about). I didn't know them personally, but would see them occasionally. I didn't understand, but I didn't tease them either.
Another encounter involved a former co-worker. She was nice, we were friends, but I didn't know that she was a lesbian until after she'd moved on to another job. She'd called the office about something, and I don't know how the subject was brought up, but she told me that she was a lesbian. I was shocked, because I thought that this was something that would always be noticeable. But, I try to get to know people on an individual basis, instead of going around looking for "signs" of the person's sexuality. I guess when I find out that a person has a different sexual identity than I'd initially thought, it's kind of like when I think that a person has a certain ethnic identity, then I'm later informed that I was wrong about that. It doesn't make me look at the person funny, but just lets me know that things (people) aren't always as they seem on the outside. And, that's OKAY.
Later on, there was another co-worker with whom I'd become friends who told me (after some time at the job) that she was a lesbian. She'd been married, and had a young daughter at the time. I didn't treat her any differently once she told me that she was a lesbian. After she'd moved on to another job, we kept in touch via e-mail, and she'd periodically bring her daughter by the office for a visit.
One more (although there are others): I have a nephew who (around family) dresses like a man, and we call him by his birth name. Occasionally, he'll wear make up around us, but I don't know whether he goes by a female name, or dresses differently around his friends. We don't treat him any differently than as the boy he was as a child (I mean, we've always addressed him as a male). Whatever his lifestyle when he's away from family, he doesn't force it on us. I'm not sure how he identifies his sexuality though. There have been several times that I've wanted to ask him to explain things to me about his life choice, but I'm generally not the in-your-face type. Maybe, one day ................
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